Our living prophet...

This weekend I had a very powerful experience. I was able to truly, and without a doubt, gain a personal witness that Thomas S. Monson is the living prophet on the earth today, and that he holds and has the power to use all the keys of the restored gospel of Jesus Christ.

I am normally fairly cynical and I usually don't just KNOW something. But after sitting and participating in yesterday's solemn assembly, even from my home, rather than actually being there, I had the strongest confirmation from the spirit that we were truly sustaining a prophet of God. I cried through the entire process. Then, everytime President Monson started speaking, or one of the other apostles or leaders spoke of President Monson as a prophet, I started crying again. For those of you who know me, that is HIGHLY unusual. I am not a crier. Period. But there was no mistaking the power of God that was present in this conference this weekend. I feel more uplifted than I have felt in months. I am glad that I was able to watch all of the sessions, at least most of them--I still had kids and a house to care for. But I was able to hear the words that Heavenly Father knew I needed to hear.

I actually spent a lot of time crying this weekend as I watched conference...and not just because of President Monson. There were several talks, and even more little pieces of talks, that I know I needed to hear. M. Russell Ballard spoke about young mothers, and the challenges facing us, as well as the honor that it is to be a mother. I needed to hear that. I have really been struggling, in general, with my job as a mother. I am struggling even more now that Cam is gone. I want to be a good mother, but I feel like I fall short. To have an apostle of the Lord tell me that I am doing ok, and that there is no one way to be a good mother, despite what those around me are telling me, brought me immeasureable comfort.

Elder Bednar spoke of meaningful prayer. Let me just say that this is REALLY something I need to work on. The way he spoke gave me a renewed desire to prayer to my Father in Heaven, because he reminded us that meaningful prayer requires effort on our part too. He reminded us that we have to go and do BEFORE we can expect to see the blessings we are asking for. That was a good reminder for me, because I have been really struggling with prayer. I just feel like my problems are too small for God to need to bother with. But for some reason, the idea that meaningful prayer includes effort on my part makes me feel better. It makes me feel like I CAN pray for help, and still be independent and do my best. I know that I need to work on aligning my will with Heavenly Father's will. But, it was still nice to have a reminder that I have accountability in the process.

There were several other talks that were wonderful and brought me much comfort. I feel so blessed to live in a day and age when I can hear God's chosen apostles bear witness of Jesus Christ so frequently. That I can read their words. That I can feel so strongly that the Savior is at the head of this church, and that we are truly striving to be more like Him and to live with Him again. I know that the fullness of the gospel has been restored to Earth, through the prophet Joseph Smith. I know that the Book of Mormon contains the fulness of Christ's gospel. I know that we have a living prophet today. I miss President Hinckley, and it was strange not to see him speak to us, but I know with absolute surety that President Monson has been called of God to lead and guide the Church today. I am so grateful for the confirmation that I was able to receive of that. I am so grateful that my family can be together eternally if we endure to the end, and strive to keep the commandments of God.

This is what I know.